1. We met and it was fine.
4. I stretched out my hands, and you took it. Sparkles and Fireworks.
12. We spoke to each other’s hot cheeks and there were April showers.
17. I could actually see your smile from the corner of your eyes.
23. It felt like having to see sunshine after dark days on an almost
37. We kissed and there was thunder and lightning, rainbows, electricity
42. Everything was so much more than I bargained for, but Lord knew I had
and held on to you so I would be okay.
45. I remember how you held me back when I tried to break the kiss,
clenching me like a sleepy koala on a tree.
47. I thought to myself, finally she is here, because I felt my heartbeat
synchronize with yours, seemed more like a repeated “mine” and “we are
meant for each other”.
49. I met your sisters. 2 of them liked me, one of them turned and spat.
53. Gave you all that a girl would want from a guy she loves, my heart
especially. I gave all of it to you.
57. I remember how I had sleepless night just staring at your pictures on
my phone, I never grew tired of that.
60. I did like a butterfly and flew.
69. But apparently, you were the only one receiving, and I was doing all
the trusting and treating. I was starved of your touch.
76. We were okay.
77. You weren’t okay.
80. I died on the inside. We weren’t okay. No, I wasn’t okay
81. I took the risk and asked, “Is there anything that I am doing wrong?
Please do tell me.” My heart bled, my eyes teared up, my feet were too
heavy, my heart really bled.
82. Then I heard you say those words “I don’t want to stay anymore,” and
walked away like you were never even here.
83. You disappeared.
84. You still weren’t back and I was 5 heartbeats away from putting my
wings back on.
85. No one knew where you were, and our stomach refused any intrusion.
86. For God’s sake, where the fuck are you? My friends are saying things
and I really want to slap your eyes out of their sockets. Because they
don’t lie. You do.
87. You came back, refusing to tell me what you should have told me but
what I wanted to hear.
89. You left and I was cracked in different places.
90. You Vanished.
91. I was trying to convince myself that I was just having a nightmare and
that I would wake up to your voice and smile, asking me if I was okay, and
why I was screaming “please don’t go,” in my dreams.
92. But no. You were really gone for good and my heart fused with
93. For God’s sake, what did I do? Was it my lack of humor? Or was it about
the last time, when I couldn’t get you the Victoria secret set you wanted?
Because, I could swear my susu was just few coins away from being able to
purchase it, or is it about my gait and that you aren’t proud to be seen
94. I blew your phone with text and calls, you ignored because you were
spending time with your new lover; that guy you told me not to worry about.
Call me psychic, paranoid but I felt it.
95. Thinking of that Cracked me in different places.
121. You came back and I would have cried but I had just put mascara on.
122. They weren’t happy you came back.
135. At some point in time, it looked like you were going to come back, we
managed a few his and automated hellos.
140. I continued to die on the inside, because I spent each day trying to
forget you, trying to get you out of my head, but like DNA you were
imprinted in me.
141. Fuck Cupid.
143. I hate to sound like the bitter one here, but hell, you left my life
virtually empty. I could actually feel my soul each time I touched my skin.
142. Fuck Cupid for using such a strongly laced arrow on me, I hoped he
lost his quiver and arrows.
148. I heard a couple of things from you that I hope I hear from only the
right one from here on. First evidence of your ability to narrate fiction
as truth. Brilliant.
196. You got a poem, a cake, and ice cream for your birthday.
199. I watched from a far, and it looks like you were having a good time.
Would I ever get better? Would ever get over you?
198. You wanted to leave again. And I was trying so hard not to break.
200. I got eye candy and Chinese and sweet smelling concoctions for mine.
220. Your new lover seemed to get you all flared up with his words. I
wonder what he said, but you seemed to love it. Killed me on the inside.
229. I wonder how you still manage to text me.
230. To tease me?? Because yeah, it’s working.
231. You left. All types of fucked up, I was.
241. You came back.
243. We were okay. Again.
244. but I still managed to convince myself that yeah. We were okay. Again.
267. I was scared you’d stop talking to me and talk to her.
272. I was scared I would fall in love with you all over again.
279. You were already talking to her.
280. Too late, it was already happening.
284. I couldn’t continue to live that way, watching you wreck my life with
a smile that was supposed to have lit it up.
288. Childish, you once said to me. But I blocked your cold, heartless self
on every platform that existed, though it took me nights to get rid of your
pictures. Hard time trying not to stare at them. Old habits and addictions
they say, die hard. But eventually I rid my life of everything that reminds
me of you.
289. I left. Finally.
290. I left. Because I. Was utterly shattered. And sick with the child all
these feels gave me. A child of pain and Gore that I. Was too young to have
and too inexperienced to know what to do with.
293. I Left because….Honestly because that was the only option I had.
294. No! I left because the Pain in my heart was growing and beginning to
metamorphose into another heart right between my lungs, choked me and all
it did was pumped… pain.
295. I left because I am a fine boy, a beautiful one for that matter and I
297. Interesting how I can still access my sense of humor in all of this
300. I had been nurturing her, and she said her first words. I was sold.
318. She grew bigger than I could imagine, and when the time came I wore her.
319. You came sniffing around. I didn’t move a bit, honestly.
327. You came sniffing around. I fell, sadly.
328. Got right back up, apologized for dirtying my child of pain now child
of newness, and acted right.
329. You left, because you’re a douche like that.
330. You left, I am sure you felt unwelcomed. Exactly that. Life has beenso good, I literally cussed myself out for believing that I won’t do well
334. I kept getting better.
335. I keep getting better.
365. I’ve been better and you don’t get to win. Ta.
366. And I will keep getting better.
Poetyk Prynx || Naa MoMo